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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Rush Therapy

This therapy is the kind that any teenager would love. Any college student would marvel at the fact to drink until they straight black and have a nice pretty bittie all on their sex organs. Maybe I go too far but I don't give a damn. I'm unique. At least that's what my mom told me today through facebook. It's crazy how she expresses more through messages than the phone. I'm the same way though so it's all "gucci" as my friend Tori says. I'm wondering do I need "Rush" therapy. To explain in a nutshell, it is "betrayal" of my race. Or at least that's how the status quo feels about it. I've never been a fan of the status or rules so I'm thinking about doing it. Devontae Palmer in a white fraternity??? Chillllll. People go too far with their assumptions about me. Truth be told, I'm looking for something through all of this partying that I have yet to find. I'm worried I will never find it, but then I remember I have 4 years in this jungle. Would I join a white fraternity? If the offer was on the table, serious consideration would happen. Would I be furious if I was rejected and treated like an ass because of my color? Na, these "extra" activities numb all the pain I go through so I would take it like any other random chick denying me after I introduce myself. Now they asking me would I join a black fraternity if the opportunity presented itself. I say I'm not really aligned to any one thing so I would give everything a chance. I'm black and I'm proud is an understatement for me. I know who I am and I know what my color is and I haven't lost a hint of blackness except one time and that is when I was brutually mauled in first grade over a girl named Jamarian(I still have minor feelings for you babe haaaaa).

I'm at the point where I'm almost done with fucking with everyone. Only person that gets love from me is Victoria and on occasion CNN. I'm deeply in love with CNN, but I think that is about to die out this weekend if I don't find a way to her heart. Mad corny for thinking about the "find your love' video right now and switching myself with Drake and her for Maliah thigha. I'm straight blackin on this post right now so if you get confused reading it just know it's because my mind travels at 3 miles and hour before it rolls. Speaking of rolls, experience might happen Friday. Again, I'm looking for something unknown so the sins I commit are only research for my inner being. He needs to get what he wants or he gets upset.

Currently jamming the fugg out of Charles Hamilton right now. He actually responded to my twitter after around 100 @'s, and he gave me good advice. I need to find the original L word and bump the fuck out of "body telepathy" and "DSW". "DSW" reminds me of deja vu girl, who will never be mentioned by name. She played me and it still burns to this day. Maybe she will follow me on twitter one day and realize that I'm just a normal guy. Starting to believe all chicks don't dig "faded" guys.

So glad I just did this. I told you guys these therapy sessions really keep me focused and I let out soooo much. Will I rush? hmmmmmm. Can't answer that. But if "rush" has what my soul has been looking for, then we will mos def meet up. Until then, I go back to the skullcandy's and chemistry. Thinking about you CNN.

Love and Hate,


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