Wylin Therapy

If you read the post below, good for you. I'm not crazy I promise you. Not a stalker or anything like that either. I had a stalker before and it didn't end on the best terms. I'm just infatuated with one person right now and I'm ready for those feelings to past so I can get on these other "hoes". I call em "hoes" because I don't think getting involved with anyone is in my best interest. I get tooo sprung per say haaaa.

Deadass though this isn't a post about love. This is about me losing my mind. Why do I do it? Is it fun to do all this shit and feel like shit in the morning? In a way, yes, in a way, no. I feel the best when I'm "influenced" by ish that I shouldn't be taking. Bad part is, I want to quit doing it and just go on with my life but I know that won't happen for a LONG time. I'm wylin cuz I'm young. No man/women can blame an 18 year old for having the time of their lives. I would party tonight if I didn't have priorities but unfortunately my mother raised me better than she thought.

Truthfully, I need a slut in my life now. Hear me out. I'm in love with this one girl but she could give a DAMN about me. I understand that. Actually I don't understand that shit because I feel I could provide for her but I feel she is scared to let me in. That or ashamed that I am a so called "nigga". Whatever though. The slut will close this void I have in my heart for the time being because I'm telling you guys, through all this wylin out and doing all the partying, I feel even lonier than before. That's why I can't stop partying. I have to find that "thing" that makes me happy and that I make happy.

I want to be known as Mr. Rager. I don't care if it's Cudi's name or not. I feel I'm like him most days anyway. I have reallly started not to give a FUCK what anyone says about me. I love it too. I'm developing into the person that I'm supposed to be and I can say I love and hate who the future Mr. Rager is going to be. Wylin cuz I'm young. I might hit up Starkville this weekend. I really need a slut to come out of the blue and let me do my thing. Don't judge me for the way I think. If you do though, I could give a fuck less. Sorry, I'm RAGING MY ASS OFF RIGHT NOW. and yes mother, I do have to get my point across by cursing. People don't understand when you talk calm and normal.

I'm off to listen to more Charles Hamilon love songs and think about the chick they call concon. I'm pathetic I know, but these feelings won't go away. Eventually they will, but for now I will just let them take control of me. I'm getting your bike shawty :) Believe that....

Can't get over you Therapy.

"Claiming that I'm just not as serious as you, shawty if you only knew...........THIS IS SERIOUS"-Drizzy Drake

I'm in love with Connor Mullins. Shawty if you only knew, this is friggin serious. Can't stop thinking about you. Makes me sick to my stomach because I DON'T WANT TO LIKE YOU AT ALL!!! But for some strange reason, all I want is you. For some reason, I think there can be SOMETHING between us but you won't let it in. I'm going TOO FAR and I really don't give a fuck. My feelings are true and real and I just want you to be with someone who can really PROVIDE for you. I plan on getting you that bike you want I swear. I know you will never read this so I'm glad I can just get it off my chest. If I don't get you, I'll live like I have been, alone and wondering who the hell is loving you. If I do get you, I'll never let that relationship end. I hope you never read this because I'm like 9.5/10 on the creeper radar right now. Deadass I'm sorry but its the way I feel. Maybe one day you will feel the same and if not, tell me if a sucka EVER hurts you or treats you wrong. I won't have that shit at all.

Love,
..............

Pain Therapy

hmmmm...I'm going through some love shit now? Deadass there are three girls on the brain right now and I want each one of them. Two know of me, one has seen me but I have yet to approach. I will though..thanks to a valuable source. Hope it doesn't go down the drain like last week's simple minded bird. I HATED trey's album the first go round. I slightly dig it the second run through. This song, however, has R.Kelly's "sex driven" mind all over it. Great job Tremaine. This goes out to CM and AK and Gabba gabba go. Hope to God they don't read this one day hahahaha.

Love and Hate,

Palmer

Rush Therapy

This therapy is the kind that any teenager would love. Any college student would marvel at the fact to drink until they straight black and have a nice pretty bittie all on their sex organs. Maybe I go too far but I don't give a damn. I'm unique. At least that's what my mom told me today through facebook. It's crazy how she expresses more through messages than the phone. I'm the same way though so it's all "gucci" as my friend Tori says. I'm wondering do I need "Rush" therapy. To explain in a nutshell, it is "betrayal" of my race. Or at least that's how the status quo feels about it. I've never been a fan of the status or rules so I'm thinking about doing it. Devontae Palmer in a white fraternity??? Chillllll. People go too far with their assumptions about me. Truth be told, I'm looking for something through all of this partying that I have yet to find. I'm worried I will never find it, but then I remember I have 4 years in this jungle. Would I join a white fraternity? If the offer was on the table, serious consideration would happen. Would I be furious if I was rejected and treated like an ass because of my color? Na, these "extra" activities numb all the pain I go through so I would take it like any other random chick denying me after I introduce myself. Now they asking me would I join a black fraternity if the opportunity presented itself. I say I'm not really aligned to any one thing so I would give everything a chance. I'm black and I'm proud is an understatement for me. I know who I am and I know what my color is and I haven't lost a hint of blackness except one time and that is when I was brutually mauled in first grade over a girl named Jamarian(I still have minor feelings for you babe haaaaa).

I'm at the point where I'm almost done with fucking with everyone. Only person that gets love from me is Victoria and on occasion CNN. I'm deeply in love with CNN, but I think that is about to die out this weekend if I don't find a way to her heart. Mad corny for thinking about the "find your love' video right now and switching myself with Drake and her for Maliah thigha. I'm straight blackin on this post right now so if you get confused reading it just know it's because my mind travels at 3 miles and hour before it rolls. Speaking of rolls, experience might happen Friday. Again, I'm looking for something unknown so the sins I commit are only research for my inner being. He needs to get what he wants or he gets upset.

Currently jamming the fugg out of Charles Hamilton right now. He actually responded to my twitter after around 100 @'s, and he gave me good advice. I need to find the original L word and bump the fuck out of "body telepathy" and "DSW". "DSW" reminds me of deja vu girl, who will never be mentioned by name. She played me and it still burns to this day. Maybe she will follow me on twitter one day and realize that I'm just a normal guy. Starting to believe all chicks don't dig "faded" guys.

So glad I just did this. I told you guys these therapy sessions really keep me focused and I let out soooo much. Will I rush? hmmmmmm. Can't answer that. But if "rush" has what my soul has been looking for, then we will mos def meet up. Until then, I go back to the skullcandy's and chemistry. Thinking about you CNN.

Love and Hate,

Mr.V

Room Therapy

Live from room 233 and your host Professor Tae-Z is currently bogged down with all kind of bullshit work. I'm trying to work on this paper for English, but I probably have the worst writer block known to man. Sometimes I feel my mind doesn't work. AT ALL. It goes to its workplace at night, though. I have had some of the craziest dreams of my life the past 3 days and I owe it all to Ms. Lucy. Thanks Dodd. Life seems so much more viewable in my eyes now. Not saying I am the suicidal type or anything but I admit I wonder why I'm living sometime. I don't like living in a world lacking purpose. These past few weeks I have been able to binge on greenery and drinks galore, and meet woman that I have strange attractions to. Ms. Mullins we need to get our relationship worked out because I know behind all of the bithcery and hard-head antics, you have some feelings for me. I've been jamming C.Hamilton in 3 hour sessions trying to get the right words to say to you....It's hard because for some strange reason I am in love. I would never tell you that because I still want you to talk to me and I don't want you to think I'm a weirdo who's just desperate for a girl. *Sigh* Speaking of love interests, there was this other girl I met two weeks ago that literally made me feel she was my future woman. I guess I was wrong since she hasn't returned any of my texts or facebook messages or twitter messages. Maybe I should chill? Yeah I think I will.....she was truly one in a million though. and from Ohio. We could have blown and listened to cudi's "Mr.Rager" all night long. That is theme music for me during the weekend. Since I've dropped my hopes of getting that chick, I returned my attention to Ms. Mullins. You think I don't see the little acts of love that you show to me when no one is around. I get it, the whole "black" guy thing is weird for you. I'm use to liking white girls. Scary thing is I prefer white girls over black girls. *Hears gasps from the crowd and sees the stank faces all the black girls give him* I'm not sure why, but I feel I was brainwashed since a child. My first girl was white. It's what I know and what I'm used to. It's the environment I was raised in. I don't no any better, but I do know that I'm feeling you and everything about you. I've got so many things to say to you, in so many different ways....sometimes I feel they can't be face to face. That's why I'm writing all this shit on my blog. You won't read it. Maybe you will. If you do, don't freak out. My love for you will not hurt. I promise. Hopefully one day you will see me as the man you want to be with some day. Until then, I will go back to my C.Hamilton music and dream about us strolling the grove, with my arm around you, and just chilling on a friday night. This is just my first "official" love note to you if that's what you want to call it. I'm OD'ing right now so I'm about to chill and go back to the music and talking shit to state fans. I feel so much better now! Look at the title and you see all my posts will be that from now on. Something doing with therapy. The though of Ms. Mullins soothes me. Damn baby you too cold. Aite I'm chillin.

Love,'

Prof. Tae-Z